Updates after Monday

Well.... I saw the consultant today for my results,he said I had a Non Small Cell Lung Cancer of the squamous cell type,he showed me a photo he took during biopsy last week,it suprised me as I always imagined cancers as a big monsterous angry mess but this looked like a little new flesh coloured smooth ball sat neatly in the entrance to my left lung,the bronchii,Sat in the neck of the tube it looked like a baby's head just showing at labour,strange my thoughts,and NO,I dont have fannies on my mind lol.
He told me without treatment,I may have 6 - 9 months,with chemo,maybe can add 3 - 6 months,what he would like to see is if its spread elsewhere,if not,he wants a surgeons opinion as to if its operable.
That opinion is critical as I already had lung surgery in 1980 on my right lung,and they considering the risk factors on whether the remaining lung would be strong enough should they remove the left .

I need to await a phone call,telling of appointment either at Bradford,or Leeds,for an in depth scan,then after the results,a team meeting to put all the cards on the table,either way,its all going to happen in the next 6 weeks.

He also told me he thought the tumour had ran 70 - 80% of its course,and that maybe it had been growing 18 months,this accounts for a lot of symptoms this last 15 months,including calling out the emergengy doctor one night late,last January 2007.

My one regret is seeing so many of my friends becoming upset over me,I never in my life wanted anyone to have hurt caused by me,and I know its not my fault,but Im hating seeing so much pain...Im sorry,I truly am.